I even get tired performing standup, which is normally a low-impact exercise in futility but looks hard the way I do it. That's why I take a lot of breaks, often stopping in the middle of a joke to catch my breath, or blame the crowd for not laughing before the punchline.

If everything was good, maybe I wouldn't have a career. I wouldn't have anything to make fun of.

I feel completely fearless when I'm on stage. And also totally fearful. There's the fear that I'm not making a very smart career move sometimes, but there's the stronger belief that these things need to be said.

My goal is to be exactly how I am offstage - although I realize I'm supposed to punctuate it with jokes.