A good storyteller is a person with a good memory and hopes other people haven't.

If writers were good businessmen, they'd have too much sense to be writers.

Middle age: when you begin to exchange your emotions for symptoms.

As I understand it, sport is hard work for which you do not get paid.

I do comedy at a lot of colleges, and at the end of those shows, I take time to be a little more real with audiences. I try to inspire them to follow their dreams. When I was that age, it was incredible to hear stuff like that.

You can be too pretty for comedy - man or woman.

Isn't it funny how babies laugh a lot? I read a toddler, a young child laughs 300 times a day. The average adult laughs, like, four times a day. God put it in them. He put the laugh in us, but I think sometimes we let life get us down, you know, have bad breaks, and we lose our breaks.

I wrote a show - just as a joke, actually - and called it 'Bipolar, Bath, & Beyond,' just to bring some humor to it. I wasn't saying to myself that I'll 'come out' with it - I didn't think there was anything to 'come out' with - I was just writing another one-woman show about my life.