Dave Barry

Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice. ”

The major parties could conduct live human sacrifices on their podiums during prime time, and I doubt that anybody would notice. ”

The information encoded in your DNA determines your unique biological characteristics, such as sex, eye color, age and Social Security number. ”

What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death. ”

Your modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from an old person, defined as a person who remembers when there was no Velcro. ”

The Internet: transforming society and shaping the future through chat. ”

It was Public Art, defined as art that is purchased by experts who are not spending their own personal money. ”

To better understand why you need a personal computer, let's take a look at the pathetic mess you call your life. ”