Ambrose Bierce

Jealous, adj. Unduly concerned about the preservation of that which can be lost only if not worth keeping. ”

Present, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of hope. ”

Famous, adj.: Conspicuously miserable. ”

Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead. ”

Bigot: One who is obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you do not entertain. ”

Egotist: a person more interested in himself than in me. ”

A person who doubts himself is like a man who would enlist in the ranks of his enemies and bear arms against himself. He makes his failure certain by himself being the first person to be convinced of it. ”

Ardor, n. The quality that distinguishes love without knowledge. ”

Curiosity, n. An objectionable quality of the female mind. The desire to know whether or not a woman is cursed with curiosity is one of the most active and insatiable passions of the masculine soul. ”

Women in love are less ashamed than men. They have less to be ashamed of. ”