Andrew J. Bernstein

Look closer at the stress in your own life and you can identify that negative emotions are always built on counterfactual statements.

Stress is not the spice of life any more than arsenic is. And without it, you won't feel bored.

Remember that stress doesn't come from what's going on in your life. It comes from your thoughts about what's going on in your life.

Some people are so used to experiencing stress that they don't remember what life was like without it.

Stress is never a given. There are people who get divorced amicably. There are people who pack up and move with no emotional toll. There is no stressor 'out there' in the world. We experience stress - or we don't - depending on what we believe.

The less you think counterfactually, the less you experience stress. Stress, in this light, isn't a bad thing. It's simply a warning system telling you that your mind has lost touch with what's real.

The elusive truth is that there is nothing stress-producing in the physical world. Things simply are. Molecules move. Light and sound appear.

To believe that your husband, wife, parents, kids, boss, job, bank account, or body is even partly responsible for your emotions, to think that there are bullets 'out there' that you have to contend with, that there are stressful life events to overcome, is to miss something vital.

Stress is a byproduct of subconscious beliefs you have about the world. You can't choose not to believe something. You believe it because you think it's true. To eliminate stress, you must learn to challenge these beliefs so that you see them differently.

You can't tell yourself that your stress is produced in your head and feel better. You still need to learn how to create a change.

The more you worry, the more you throw off the delicate balance of hormones required for health.

It's time we learned the truth about stress. It's time we identified the thoughts that actually create our stress and learned to dismantle them one by one.