Don't tell me how to do my job. I don't come to your workplace and tell you how to sweep up.

I don't aim to offend.

I don't believe in angels, no. But I do have a wee parking angel. It's on my dashboard and you wind it up. The wings flap and it's supposed to give you a parking space. It's worked so far.

I loved Japan. I used to read a lot about it when I was a child. And I always wanted to go. And it was delightful. I absolutely loved it. What a smashing place.

When I've had to edit my albums, I'll listen to it one time through, and I'll make edits. I want to remember to set up a camera to record myself listening to my set, because I don't even slightly crack a smile, I am just listening for technical details, and I look like somebody that has absolutely no sense of humor. I look insane.

The women doing comedy do not even think of themselves as 'female' comedians.

On Twitter, people just want to hear a joke. They don't really want to know about your life.

Pellegrini gave me back the joy of playing football. He is like Arsene Wenger: someone who likes to joke, someone who likes to talk and take an interest in your life.