The logic was, there weren't too many female comedians, so I thought I might as well try a field that had fewer competitors than the field I was in, which was acting, singing and dancing.

I don't plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts until my ears meet.

Stand-up is my favorite thing I've ever done. There's so much independence.

I had the worst birthday party ever when I was a child because my parents hired a pony to give rides. And these ponies are never in good health. But this one dropped dead. It just wasn't much fun after that. One kid would sit on him and the rest of us would drag him around.

If we do not lay out ourselves in the service of mankind whom should we serve?

My father was and is a great father. My father always wanted to do stand-up. He wanted to be an actor. But instead he did two jobs. He did customer service at a hospital and he worked as a waiter at night. He pretty much sacrificed everything for his daughters.

I don't think my basic business strategy is well known by the public, probably because people think it's too simple. My strategy has always been to try to focus in on a product or service where you can create a dollar of value for 20 cents and sell it for 40 cents.

Among the most serious allegations a federal court can address are that an Executive agency has targeted citizens for mistreatment based on their political views. No citizen - Republican or Democrat, Socialist or libertarian - should be targeted or even have to fear being targeted on those grounds.