When people meet me, many times they're very surprised because they expect someone who is kind of wacky with seven piercings and very hip and cool and New York City, and I'm not.

As a writer, you can't allow yourself the luxury of being discouraged and giving up when you are rejected, either by agents or publishers. You absolutely must plow forward.

I'm like the guy who prepares your taxes or a dentist. I'm very conservative and boring in a lot of ways.

I can't tell you how much I love Target and Costco, that kind of culture, because it's something I never felt a part of. I've always felt like a tourist because I have never fit in anywhere.

My career? I never think of it as a 'career.' Art and music and all those things that I'm creating are just part of me.

There's sketch, improv, writing, acting, music, and badminton. Those are the seven forms of comedy. But I do like the idea of being an auteur in the sense of writing and being in your own stuff.

It takes as much imagination to create debt as to create income.

Creativity is the sudden cessation of stupidity.