A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.

People say I owe a lot to television. The fact is I was a star long before television. What TV made me is unemployed.

Experience is what you have after you've forgotten her name.

My doctor told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already.

I guess as you get older you sort of see the mechanics, even with the best comedians. There's admiration for people I admire, but it's not guttural laughter. It's a wry 'Oh, well done, sir.' But I sort of miss that slightly; I miss the raw joy of comedy I used to get.

Every few months I'll pop into a comedy club or go to Vegas.

I realized that comedians of the day were operating on jokes and punch lines. The moment you say the punch line, the audience either laughs sincerely or they laugh automatically or they don't laugh. The thing that bothered me was that automatic laugh. I said, that's not real laughter.

Anyone that knows me knows I love to joke around and have fun.