I was a guy who wanted to become famous. There was steam coming out of my ears, I wanted to be famous so badly. You want the attention, you want the bucks, and you want the best seat in the restaurant. I didn't think what the repercussions would be.

My favorite actor was, is, Michael Keaton. Certainly growing up, in the movie 'Night Shift' he did something brand new that I hadn't seen before that we all steal from now. And then it was in 1987 he did the movie 'Clean and Sober' and 'Beetlejuice' in the same year, and that was when I said, 'Wow, that's what I want to do.'

To be a comedian, you have to have some darkness behind it. I certainly draw on my past, and it helps.

Ninety percent of video game AI really is pretty damn bad. I think that's actually why it's so much fun to shoot things. Because the AI is so bad and the characters are so annoying.

My job is to put words together and tell a story. If that doesn't work for you, it's not a war crime.

I always say, you know, if I sit here and close my eyes and say, 'When did I learn the most in my life, in my career?' It'll always be when I close them and everything I think of is when I took a risk. It's when I think I learned the most.

I'm never the kind of person who's sitting at home reading the charts and basing how I feel about myself or even my career on stats. I've always based it on, 'Am I doing the best that I can do?'

All I can do is do my part and keep trying to open up eyes with what I did on the football field, what I did in my career. Just go out there and try to compete and shock a couple more people.