Charlie Sheen

Fame is empowering. My mistake was that I thought I would instinctively know how to handle it. But there's no manual, no training course. ”

I'm sorry, man, but I've got magic. I've got poetry in my fingertips. Most of the time - and this includes naps - I'm an F-18, bro. And I will destroy you in the air. I will deploy my ordinance to the ground. ”

I'm dealing with fools and trolls and soft targets. It's just strafing runs in my underwear before my first cup of coffee. I don't have time for these clowns. ”

When friends asked me, Can we help? I'd say, Not unless you can alter time, speed up the harvest or teleport me off this rock. I used that line from Star Wars. ”

I've got volumes on how not to behave. I've got more information now than a guy should have at my age. ”

I think what drove me insane for a long time is feeling like I hadn't earned most of what I achieved because it came so fast. ”

I don't have time for their judgement and their stupidity and you know they lay down with their ugly wives in front of their ugly children and look at their loser lives and then they look at me and they say, 'I can't process it' well, no, you never will stop trying, just sit back and enjoy the show. You know? ”

You can't process me with a normal brain. ”

We're going to shoot one Polaroid per show. I'm going to sign this before it even develops because I know that once it develops with my signature on it, it's worth a fortune. I'll make this a work of magic warlock art. ”

People say you have to work on your resentments. Yeah, no, I'm gonna hang onto them and they're gonna fuel my attack. ”