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Lewis Black

Comedian United States 1948–present

77 quotes in the archive

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Usually I'm too tired to apologize.
Lewis Black
Democrats should be focused on which way we can help the most people in this country, and Republicans should be focused on how to do that in the most fiscally responsible manner possible.
Lewis Black
I am angry that the Democrats don't have the ability to explain to Republicans that we should be able to feed people in this country, and that is not socialism.
Lewis Black
People would be a lot better off if they'd enjoy being single.
Lewis Black
Being a playwright is like the equivalent of doing a jigsaw puzzle that has 1,500 pieces, and it's a jigsaw of a blue sky. Not a cloud in sight.
Lewis Black
I'm a happy person but an angry citizen.
Lewis Black
You got to be just stupid to not be focused on alternative energy.
Lewis Black
I'm constantly in fear of having a stroke.
Lewis Black
Do you know what 'meteorologist' means in English? It means liar.
Lewis Black
As psychotic as it gets outside, the comic can be more psychotic.
Lewis Black
I'm amazed that anyone is interested in what I have to say.
Lewis Black
I'm not a great joke writer, which is odd for a comic to say, but I'm not.
Lewis Black