Casey Stengel

The trick is growing up without growing old. ”

The trouble is not that players have sex the night before a game. It's that they stay out all night looking for it. ”

The trouble with women umpires is that I couldn't argue with one. I'd put my arms around her and give her a little kiss. ”

They told me my services were no longer desired because they wanted to put in a youth program as an advance way of keeping the club going. I'll never make the mistake of being seventy again. ”

Being with a woman all night never hurt no professional baseball player. It's staying up all night looking for a woman that does him in. ”

I broke in with four hits, and the writers promptly declared they had seen the new Ty Cobb. It took me only a few days to correct that impression. ”

Without losers, where would the winners be? ”

The key to being a good manager is keeping the people who hate me away from those who are still undecided. ”

Managing is getting paid for home runs that someone else hits. ”

Good pitching will always stop good hitting and vice-versa. ”