Greg Giraldo

Some people are just really goofy kind of guitar acts, and they go out and do these colleges and start making a fortune pretty early on. And other people - I know guys who are great comics, who've done the Letterman show many times, who still barely pay their bills. ”

I've always had real trouble knowing what my actual desires and goals are. I've just been dragged along by fate. ”

The reality is I'm not a 'get knocked down and come back harder' kind of guy. ”

Little did I know that earning a living at stand-up is the hardest thing you can do. But once I started doing it, I just loved it, and I realized that I was actually kinda good at it, and then that was it. ”

The hardest part, for real, is probably when you just don't feel like going on stage and being funny. ”

The things that make me laugh are considered smart or whatever, I guess. But stuff that's self-consciously intelligent or self-consciously hip or cool, that doesn't do it for me either. You just try to be funny. ”

If you spend five minutes with me or watch me try to balance my checkbook, you can only imagine the disaster I would make of anyone's legal issues. ”