Craig Ferguson

I'm a terrible interviewer. I'm not a journalist - although I have a Peabody Award - and I'm not really a late-night host. What I am is honest. ”

It's not that we fly by the seat of our pants. We're not afraid of failure. ”

If Scotland and America go to war, I'm afraid I've already sworn in. ”

I wanted to be a rock star. ”

I just do my thing and try each show to be more honest about why I am and who I am. It's quite tricky and actually nerve-racking to do that. It's kind of a happy train wreck. ”

When I stopped drinking, it was only because I thought if I don't stop, I'm going to die. ”

I got sober. I stopped killing myself with alcohol. I began to think: 'Wait a minute - if I can stop doing this, what are the possibilities?' And slowly it dawned on me that it was maybe worth the risk. ”

It's like, it's kind of like if you ever had a car and it was a bit of a clunker but you love it, that's my show. It's a bit of a clunker but I know where everything is and I like it. ”

I try and live my life in bite-size chunks. ”

I've been running my whole life. Running into bars, running around the world. But when you have a child, you can't run. That was a revelation. ”