Bassem Youssef

The bigger you become of a celebrity, the bigger the expectations, the pressure on you - to make change, to say what people want, to target the people they want to target. Fame is toxic; it is quite toxic. ”

I do think that this planet is a totally unjust planet. I mean throughout history - history paints a beautiful picture when it's written by the victorious, but it's a planet that belongs to the strong and the more able, and usually they are tyrants. So basically, I don't see justice happening to the crushed and the weak. ”

I can go back to Egypt anytime I want. Can I leave Egypt anytime I want? I think I can. I think I can. ”

Sarcasm all around the world is always against right wing and against people in power. That's the definition of political sarcasm. ”

I get very confused about being called a comedian, because when you say 'I'm a comedian,' people expect you to crack a joke. Maybe I use laughter and humour to make people think. I don't know what you call that - a humourist? A satirist? A pessimistic comedian? I don't know. Satirists can be very dark. ”

It's kinda me and Jon Stewart have a pact together - so he's making me famous in the Western world and I'm making him famous in Egypt! ”

Countries aren't built by boring people. ”

There's no glory and no respect in making fun of the weak, the powerless. ”

Part of the reason why people get radicalized is because they feel they are disenfranchised; that they not there; that they are bullied. But if they are represented, they can't go and say to themselves: 'Oh, this society hates us!' ”

Theocratic and military authorities share one thing: they have no sense of humour. ”