Ari Shaffir

My father said that I was lower than a dog, because even a dog believes in God. ”

I'm a cultural Jew, I was raised with it, so I'm still into it, like gefilte fish with kugel. ”

Failing is part of my process. A new bit never works the first time. I figure I have to bomb 7 times to make it good. So I tweak it. ”

To me, every time it goes badly I see it as a good thing - because that means I'm one step closer to where I want to be. ”

I think you're a comedian as soon as you start. I don't think there's a moment where you become a full comic. ”

I used to get a lot of death threats. After a while I realized that no one's gonna do anything or they would've. ”

If I focus solely on developing new material, then I can get a new 45 minute to an hour in about six months. Then I'll work on it and work on it and can make it killer within another six months or so. ”