Al Goldstein

Married life is an existence with bars around it.

If you cannot work on the marriage or the women is a moron, staying married and cheating makes the most sense because divorce is disruptive to the family life and your bank account.

The true success is the person who invented himself.

To date or not to date that is the question. It's almost as important as Shakespeare's to be or not to be which deals with death.

Our photographs are filthier and our stories are more disgusting. We make no effort to be artistic.

Married sex is like being awake during your own autopsy. It is root canal work without anesthetic.

Even though marriage is doomed, if you turned it into a job you like and really work at it - it can be salvaged.